Via ESPN |
I hate to start anything with a “Webster’s Dictionary
states...” style definition, but it has a point, so bear with me:
class*less
adjective
1. (of a society) not divided into social classes.
Wait a minute, that’s not right. Okay, maybe this is closer.
2. characterized by the absence of economic and social distinctions
Not really, but kind of...wait, okay here we go:
class
adjective
informal: showing stylish excellence
Classless.
Without class. Having no
class. Sans class. The inability to show stylish
excellence. These are all ideas of
classlessness. In the sports
world, classless relates to a direct and wiling attack against the rules with
the intent of harming another player or the laws of the game. Playing the game with a reckless
disregard for all things good and just in the sport. Playing outside of the box, in effect, is not allowed in the
sports world. Walter Sobchak would
have made a great commissioner with the motto, “Am I the only one around here
who gives a sh*t about the rules?”
But, if a player does this enough, or in a gloriously reckless way, they
are labeled by the fans of that sports as a “cheat”, “dirty”, or
“classless”. In hockey it can
range from anything from playing the puck from the bench, to making direct
intentional contact with another player for the sake of injuring that player or
to seek retribution, to sucker punching an opponent in the back of the
head. The NHL’s most recent
talking point revolves around intent to injure, most notably, headshots and
removing dangerous collisions.
One hopes that Brendan Shanahan and the rest of the NHL
rules people are doing their best to get rid of the dirty plays much like those
hot beats off of Raffi Torres’s Greatest Hits Album. But, to call someone like Torres dirty is missing the point:
his style of play is no longer tolerated in the NHL. He must serve a 25 game suspension, and if he doesn’t
straighten up and fly right after serving his suspension, he will be socially
ostracized, he will be awarded no points, and may God have mercy on his soul.
But, what does it mean to be a classless, dirty, goon, punk,
no-good dirty rotten rebel hotshot who plays by no one else’s rules but his
own? Well, by playing outside of
the box, they essentially play outside of the established rules. Thus not playing the game hard, fast,
clean, and with “stylish excellence”, right? How about playing without “integrity”, which literally means
just playing within the rules.
It’s when players play outside of the established rules, jeopardizing the
“integrity of the game”, that commissioner Gary Bettman or Shanahan step in.
Recently, the hard part for the League is defining
“integrity”, a continuously fluid idea in a violent sport like hockey. A hit legal in the year 2000 is not
legal now, for obvious reasons, but it does not mean that players avoided making
that hit then. The role of the
goon, like–albeit a fictional example–the Hanson brothers from the movie
Slapshot, a reckless abandon style of player on most lineups through the early
to mid-2000s, has all but disappeared from most teams in an effort to implement
more offense and skill to the game.
Sometimes the League's definition of this fluid idea causes confusion among players and coaches. Applying this idea to the recent Pens–Flyers
series and final meetings in the regular season, one sees how team personnel
and the League can interpret the idea of “integrity” differently. Take Flyers coach Peter Laviolette’s
argument with Penguins coach Dan Bylsma, calling him “gutless” for playing his
fourth line with less than two minutes left in a decided game a
week before the playoffs. Yes,
hard hits were had, and fighting ensued, but the Penguins players did not do
anything outside of the established rules. Unexpected, yes, but not enough to say that they jeopardized
the integrity of the game.
Conversely, look at the Pens-Flyers playoff Game 3, when Penguins Arron Asham, Craig Adams, and James Neal went outside of the rules with their
excessive violence. The league stepped
in and suspended all three players.
How about, for fun, we label them as “classless” players, you know, just to
get a row out of those journalistic types. What does that mean?
It means they are players that take the rules into their own hands;
players that the league will look at much closer in the future. The league knows who to watch,
especially those “repeat offenders” that Shanahan talks about. Yeah, maybe we as fans don’t agree with
every decision (*cough* Shea Weber *cough*), but be sure precedent has been set
and will be set for the future with every dangerous hit. The beauty of modern sport lies in the
ability to fluctuate and change as needed.
So, applying this idea to something semi-local, the
“classless”, “dirty”, “goon” mantra has officially started in the Kings-Blues
series. This same dialogue went on
during the Kings-Canucks series with numerous accusations of diving, headshots,
and aggressive play through the first three games. You see this to a lesser extent in the Blues-Sharks series,
notably with the fight at the end of Game 2 – the beginning of the end for the
Sharks.
Game 1 of the Kings-Blues series saw a questionable hit by
the Kings’ Dwight King on Blues defenseman Alex Pietrangelo. Immediately, two opposing sides form on
whether or not this hit is a malicious and dangerous, and thus suspendable,
play. Ultimately, the league
decided not to punish King any further (he got 2 minutes for boarding
for the hit). Then, Game 2 gave us
the crazy physical play by the Blues after the Kings’ fifth goal, and the
borderline hit by Kings d-man Willie Mitchell (past concussion victim) on Jamie
Langenbrunner. Otherwise, you’re
just talking about two tough teams beating the crap out of each other for about
38 minutes. As NBC Sports
commentator Brian Engblom stated in roundabout fashion numerous times during the third period (and
I’m paraphrasing) “This is the playoffs.”
Alas, Mr. Engblom's assertion aside, the conversation in the comments section gets ugly or non compos mentis and strong opinions form among the fans of the two sides, and,
as stated in the Internet Guide to Civil Conversation and Open Dialogue Vol.
III, that does not follow the modern conventions of cordial hockey debates.
When in doubt about the physicality of an NHL playoff
series, ask this question: Has
either team gone out of their way to be malicious or make a mockery
of the game? I don’t think
so. It’s hard hitting. It’s a battle. It’s going to be rough at times because
neither team wants to give up an inch.
And, in that same vain, no player wants to cost their team by sitting
out or become the primary focus of the referees.
Is Dustin Brown classless for his aggressive board play and
whiplash effect? How about Carlo
Colaiacovo for rabbit punching Brown?
If you answer 'yes' in either case, then there are many other current and former
players you can lump in the dirty pile with them.
So, the point of all this is that the Reactionary Internet
Community doesn’t mean “classless” when they say “classless,” nor do they
understand that when they say “dirty” they actually mean “classless,” which, if
you were just paying attention, is not the word they actually mean. They mean “belittling the integrity of
the game,” but, as mentioned, the integrity of the game is a fluid idea, which
it should be in a progressive society like this one. The Reactionary Internet Community (as well as the Ignorant Internet Folks) will say what they want to say, and there is nothing you or I or
anyone can do about it. You can
troll as much as anyone else can troll, and that’s about it, and that solves
nothing (except being incredibly hilarious sometimes).
But, my main point: Always question things. Question the League. Question the motivations of the
players, for they are in fact human beings. But, have confidence that the League will handle things in
an appropriate way, and that players will play the game right. And, dammit,
above all else, just enjoy yourself.
I mean, it’s the freakin’ Stanley Cup playoffs!
***
Oh, hey, I’m on that Twitter contraption now! Shhhh, don’t tell me how 2009 turns out, I haven’t gotten
all the way through yet.
For all Kansas City-area related hockey news and links to
other cool stuff (and links to articles on this blog), follow @FlubberMcGee
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